Happy Birthday, here’s to twenty nine

Attachment parenting, Family, Marriage, Mother, Parenting, Publishing a children's book, Small Business, Uncategorized

It’s the real twenty nine, just in case you were wondering.

This post is going to be completely about me. Let’s hope I can stay true to that promise!

Often I blog about Zaccai, work, life challenges, and my husband/marriage. But, I haven’t spend much time just focusing on ME.

As a partner/lover and even friend, I create so much positivity/energy and dump 100% into these people. But, what about ME?

I often forget I have needs, desires and even dreams.

So, here today, I’m going to share these with you. And, I’ll be completely honest {even share my life’s fears}.

From infancy to 29, I’ve always been fabulous. Even when I was 55 pounds overweight, I was fabulous. Maybe not to the rest of the world, but I knew better.

Some moments in my life that shaped who I am today:

My parents first nasty fight. I was probably about 3 or 4. I heard them arguing and knew I needed to get them to see eye to eye, at 3 or 4. I went into the kitchen, stood in the middle and yelled, “stop!!!!” They quickly sent me back to my room; hey, a girls gotta try.

At 6, my parents separated and my dad moved us kids to Japan. No mom. Who knows the complete story, if there is one…? My dad has his side, my mom has her side and the rest of the family has a side. Who cares, at this point I was without a mom and I raised my 2 brothers. At 6.

Ages 8-12 my parents fought over custody and I was in the middle. Literally. The boys wanted to live with my mom and I wanted to keep the peace. I felt bad telling either parent who I really wanted to live with. Dad won. Then, mom won. We cried. Tears of joy, mostly, but, my heart broke for my dad. Divorces are hard on everyone.

During the custody battle time my mom came out of the closet and Linda became officially known as mom’s girlfriend. We loved Linda.

Age 14. Linda and mom broke up after years and years of being together. I said to my mom, “why does everyone we love leave us.” At that moment, I didn’t want anyone else to come close to our family for fear they would leave, abandon us.

Age 16. I moved in with my grandmother and my mom lived in Chicago for work. My mom met an amazing woman, Norma. My dad, stepmom and brothers lived in Japan.. and I enjoyed the freedom my grandmother gave us… She was the cool granny!

Age 17. I went to college. I never thought I’d make it that far.

Age 21. I joined WW and lost 55 pounds. Where did that come from!?

Age 23. I graduated with a master’s degree. 102 k debt, thank you.

Age 25. Married my sweet husband.

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Age 26-27 Baby on the way!

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Age 27. Zaccai.

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Age 28. Our life has changed forever.

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What’s in for 29!? I’m publishing a book and hoping for some funding- next post I’ll share. I’m hoping for an exciting new position at work, maybe! I’m hoping for a stronger year of marriage and debt pay-off… Please, please, please, debt pay-off in my future!

Isn’t life a journey? It’s insane and I want things to quiet before they get insane, again! #ellen2015

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